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You are receiving this message because you subscribed
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Hi *** Kekeko,

It's amazing, isn't it?

Amazing how when anxiety strikes, we convince
ourselves that if only we could control X, Y, or Z
in our external environment, we could stop the
anxiety.

Let me show you what I mean.

For example, you may figure that if you feel
anxious at restaurants, then you'll simply go to
restaurants less often or avoid them.

Or if you feel anxious when your boss gives
constructive criticism, you figure you'll simply do
things perfectly or avoid your boss and that way
the anxiety will go away.

Or if you feel anxious driving when it rains, you
figure you can simply not drive far from home on
rainy days.

On the surface these rationalizations may seem
logical. However, what we don't realize is that
when we fail to address the anxiety in a productive
way, it GROWS. It intensifies and spills over into
other areas.

Over time we limit more activities in our lives in
order to "control" the anxiety -- until our activities,
our health, and our happiness are severely affected.

Sure, it may not seem like a big deal to not drive
on rainy days. Soon though, you're not driving
when it's a cloudy day, when there's a two percent
chance of rain in the forecast, or when it's raining in
Zimbabwe.

External control is not the answer.

So how do we overcome anxiety? We overcome
anxiety by using our GENUINE control.

Genuine control is the INTERNAL control that each
of us has to determine how to perceive, think and
act.

Here's something I wrote on genuine control that
you might enjoy.

WHAT IS GENUINE CONTROL?

Written by Deanne Repich, copyright 2003

-- Genuine control is not something lost or gained
according to what someone else says, does or
thinks. It is within me in abundance at all times.

-- Genuine control is not about trying to make
people like or love me. It's about liking and loving
myself and allowing my inner beauty to shine
through.

-- Genuine control is not something that comes
from manipulating the external environment -- other
people, events, and circumstances. It comes from
changing my internal environment -- how I perceive
and act.

-- Genuine control does not result in feelings of
powerlessness, anxiety, and self-doubt. It results
in feelings of empowerment, contentment, and
increased self-esteem.

-- Genuine control does not drag me down. It lifts
me up.

-- Genuine control does not come and go depending
on how I'm feeling at the moment. It is within me at
all times, even if I choose not to realize it or use it.

-- Genuine control does not mean attempting to
make others do things my way and think the way I
want. It means making my own choices and thinking
for myself.

-- Genuine control does not mean looking outside
of myself to determine who I am. It means looking
within myself and appreciating who I am.

-- Genuine control does not mean single-handedly
transforming economies, business climates, and
political realities. It means transforming my internal
reality (myself), which in turn positively affects the
whole.

-- Genuine control is not about predicting the future
-- my grades, my income, my relationships, or a
thousand other things. It's knowing that whatever
happens I can choose how to perceive and react
to life's events.

-- Genuine control does not mean trying to change
someone else's feelings. It means that each person's
feelings are his or hers alone, just as my feelings
are mine alone.

-- Genuine control does not mean never making
mistakes. It means understanding that making
mistakes (and learning from them!) is essential
to my success.

-- Genuine control is not about feeling the need
to change other peoples' preferences and opinions.
It means developing and respecting my own.

-- Genuine control does not mean attempting
the impossible and feeling disappointed that I did
not achieve it. It means attempting the possible
and congratulating myself on each small success
I achieve.

-- Genuine control does not mean telling others
how to spend their time. It means choosing how I
spend my time.

-- Genuine control does not mean other people,
events, and situations determine my feelings,
thoughts, and actions. It means that I choose how
to feel, think, and act.

-- Genuine control is not about trying to stop the
rain, the snow, or the sunshine. It's about making
rainbows, snowmen, and sand castles. :)

-- Genuine control is not about attempting to change
what other people think, do, and feel because I know
what's best for them. It's about deciding how I react
to what others think, do, and feel because I know
what's best for me.

-- Genuine control does not mean controlling all of
life's events. It means interpreting life's events in
a way that promotes my growth, happiness, and
well-being.

//////////////////////////////////////////

Want to access your genuine control and conquer
your anxiety? Get your risk-free trial of the Conquer
Anxiety Success Program now at:

https://www.conqueranxiety.com/orders2/order1.asp


Best wishes,



Deanne Repich
Director - National Institute of Anxiety and Stress, Inc.
900 E. Pecan St., Ste. 300, PMB 305
Pflugerville, TX 78660 http://www.conqueranxiety.com
Tools for Creating a Healthy, Anxiety-Free Life


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